A Feri sister asked the other day: if you could describe your life as a fairy tale which would it be? I thought about this question with all do seriousness as any addle brained person in transition would. Something to remove the hostile grounds of boxes, tape, heat and sore muscles. I loved the question and realized that it was a serious question indeed as it would be very revealing to my psyche so it had better be accurate.
I delved into all of the old ones I love. Grimms came to mind, but that's not what screamed into my ears with any relevance at all to my life. What popped into mind as most reflective of me was Lady in the Water. I know, nothing old and historic with thousands of years standing behind it. It is a modern fairy tale set in a modern world, told by a modern shaman. But it seems to be accurate of my life's patterns. I am Story. I point out the purpose and direction of the lives of those around me who seem to be lost in the pattern this world weaves around them. I seem to be a compass of sorts, just like Story. Her very presence helps people unravel the map of their lives. I love Story. She is naive and courageous at the same time. She has no idea how brave she is. In fact, she feels weak and insecure in the world she has been dropped into, I relate to that. She is more worried about everyone elses' lives than what her role amongst her people is. She does not realize the enormity of her mission and what it means for her. Her own success is not at the top of her mind. She is wrapped up in Cleaveland's life. The people around her seem to discover more about her mystery than she can guess. She is only worried about one thing: her vessel.
I was much younger when this happened and I am only now beginning to understand the implications of it. I was in a smoke shoppe cafe holding on to my journal calendar. It was the early '90's. A elder man looked at me and the journal I was carrying observing the questions I was asking the barista. He turned to me and spoke mystifying words to me at the time: " You are a chronicler of the soul." He was striking black man with stark white hair and beard. I had never seen anything as beautiful as the contrast of this. I had no response for his statement. What does a young 20 something nitwit like me say to that???? I bowed my head in embarrassment trying to puzzle out what that meant. Yes, indeed, I used to consider myself as dull, dumb and a waste of oxygen, probably space as well. I am older now, I have realized that in my youth I allowed others to define me and relegate me to a place on a shelf of triviality and delusion. It was a time when a person like myself who saw things differently was not acceptable. Some of the people I hung out with took my gift of reading cards and signs as a cry of needing attention instead of a boon.
I think as we are growing into who we are to become we have no idea how important we are to the whole of the web. One string attaches to another and therefore is an important part of the web, for if it is severed the web becomes undone and is weaker for it's absence. Therefore it is important to recognize what thread and what color you are in the web. So I ask you, what fairy tale to do fit in? It need not be a fairy tale of old. It can be a modern one, there are many to choose from. Are you Snow White, or are you Unbreakable. Who are you? You need not answer to me, you can peruse this question in solitude. I would be interested in hearing your answers, of course, but it is more important to recognize yourself.
Wow, what a powerful post! Really well written, Nalaya! I'll have to ponder which one is me, but what a cool exercise! I love that you relate to "Story". I think she's perfect for you. I'll happily share when I find mine. Thanks so much for this!
ReplyDeleteThat was extremely well written! Makes me wonder which one I am. It's a little too in depth for a mind without her coffee this morning but I will definitely think about it when I'm caffeinated! I found you through witches of etsy team. I will be following you! Nice to meet ya new friend! You are welcome to follow me if you would like though I don;t think I post anything this deep! :)
ReplyDeleteLove and light!
Truly great post, very thought provoking. I am sure that this question is going to stay with me a long time and will find a place in my journaling. Right now, without too much pondering, I can see a compilation of fairy tales, from The Red Shoes to Rapunzel to Sleeping Beauty. Each phase of my life bringing new lessons, the biggest of which is not to wait for someone else to "wake me up". Thanks!
ReplyDeleteLove, love, love this post Nalaya!! It too has me contemplating what fairy tale I would be. :)
ReplyDeleteLike the others, I'm also sitting behind my laptop pondering your question. This may take awhile, if it comes to me I will def let you know. :) I always seem to have so many changes and chaos in my life so this should be interesting. Absolutely awesome post!!
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