Tuesday, December 4, 2012

The Chariot lesson

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Things turn slower in house neighborhoods as opposed to apartment neighborhoods. The frenzied activity of life is concentrated into a smaller place with more people spinning the wheel. I think I did okay as an apartment dwelling witch. I managed to keep the muck and mire of it all of that mostly at bay and made some really great friends of trees from head to stern of the Valley. I can feel the layers of adjustment peel away in finer and finer layers, but extended apartment living leaves it's mark. It gets so quiet around here that when I feed Bruiser * the hearth's beta fish*, I can hear him chew. Yes, I said that: I can hear my fish chew his food. That is an experience I probably would have never had in the apartments.

Everything about this last part of the year has been about trying to get me to slow down, and I have had no success with my compulsion to get up and go do something, anything, right now. In this failure of mine, I have manifested cold after cold after allergy attack and whatever else was floating around at the cootie factory we call schools and THEN some. I think I got this way because I kept drawing the Chariot. Every time I saw the Chariot show up. I felt as though I wasn't doing enough, or well enough in one area. Somehow I kept feeling as though I were being reminded that I was insufficient in some mysterious manner and had to prove my worth to the Universe.

I think I read that wrong. The thing that caught my attention was a recent experience I had at a friends house. She had mentioned that something had been missing. I had my pendulum on me asked if we could use this as practice fodder. She agreed and we proceeded to ask a bunch of yes-no questions. We managed to find what it was we were looking for in short order, actually. The trigger for my realization came when we hit a bit of a snag in our spirit conversation. As it turned out, our perspectives were not quite in synch. His idea of a back closet was different than ours.

Communication is difficult. It's amazing we succeed at it at all.

So back to the Chariot. The message wasn't: you're a mess, take charge. The message was: you are choking up the reigns.

Oops.


***In other news: my phone has decided that it no longer likes twitter or most social media apps so all things with my twitter will have to be done from Dinoputer. Really, I'm not ignoring you. With Tumblr and Twitter not working for me, I am not able to post pics from my phone, which sort of chaps my hide. Until I get this slowly sorted out, I will have to rely on the wealth of imagery provided already on the web. I will do my best to properly credit what I borrow. I will still be checking in and answering emails and generally raising Caine.

2 comments:

  1. Ha!! I'm glad you're finally getting the message to SLOW DOWN, beloved Fey. ~wink~ I think the choking the reigns message also means not only is your pace to harried but you need to loosen up on your need to control every freakin thing. I know it's an Alpha thing so this will take some doing. ;-) Bummer about your phone and Twitter. Did you download the two recent IOS updates in Settings? They changed the entire structure of iPhone and how the apps work. Love you dearly!!!! ~manymassivetacklehugs~

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  2. I haven't live in an apartment for ages but somehow this time of year is busy for most of us.
    But remember we all need to take care of our self.

    Coffee is on.

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